NEYDL-Annual-Rep-2023.indd

‘There was a load of anxiety building up to being a first-time dad at such a young age.’ (Young Dad) ‘The play (Father Unknown) represented young dads exactly how life is for us, and Ryan (actor) couldn’t have done a better job at acting. It was great. Maybe it will open people’s eyes about young dads and the struggles.’ (Young Dad) 10 North East Young Lads & Dads | ANNUAL REPORT 2023 A STANDING OVATION: FATHER UNKNOWN By Kevin Stoodley On a balmy summer’s evening in 2023, I was lucky enough to be in the audience for the first performance of Father Unknown, a funny, honest, and powerful exploration of young fatherhood majestically portrayed by rising North East star of stage and screen Ryan Noble (most recently appearing in the BBC comedy drama series Power of Parker) at Durham’s Gala Theatre. In Father Unknown, Ryan plays the role of Alfie, a 16-year-old Gateshead lad who discovers he’s going to be a young dad during his GCSE exams. Over the course of the next hour, Ryan takes us on a rollercoaster ride as Alfie tries to navigate the complexities of young fatherhood, from ‘breadwinner’ expectations to exam pressures, maternal family interference and gatekeeping, to misunderstanding and misjudgement. And whilst it’s fair to say that Alfie does drop a few major clangers along the way (who hasn’t?) and probably wouldn’t be everyone’s choice for ‘father of the year’, he is unrelenting in his desire to play an active, loving and meaningful role in his son’s life, like so many of the young men we are lucky enough to meet and support every day here at NEYDL. In a deeply moving scene towards the end of the play, we are invited to watch Alfie just being a dad to his child, a cherished experience for young Alfie which offers both hope and yet fragility, due to factors that are largely out of his control. The play closes with anonymous and authentic voice recordings made by the eloquent young dads supported by NEYDL, recollecting how they felt when they first heard they were going to be a dad, their first encounter with their new-born and what fatherhood means to them now. It’s fair to say that you could hear a pin drop in the theatre at this moment, as it suddenly dawned on the uninitiated members of the audience that Alfie’s story was not a work of escapist fiction, but an accurate portrayal of the very real challenges and barriers sadly faced by so many young dads both in our region and beyond. Following an extended and rapturous standing ovation (a reaction repeated during sold out performances at Northern Stage over the next 2 days), I had the pleasure to hang out with a group of NEYDL’s first ever service beneficiaries (the ‘Founding Fathers’ as they are lovingly known here at NEYDL), who had travelled from Durham, Gateshead, and Wales to see the play. We laughed, talked, and spun stories well into the night, covering many subjects including their children and families, new relationships, career changes, studies (one of the dads is now studying marine biology at university) and memories of the Wednesday night young dads group in Gateshead they had all attended for several years at the start of their fatherhood journeys, at a similar age to young Alfie in the play. Whilst none of their fatherhood journeys have been easy, and more challenges lie ahead for at least one of the dads in trying to maintain regular contact with his non-resident child, their love for their children and commitment to the role of father and parent was just as strong as it was on the first day we met. But unlike Alfie, thanks to the connections they had made through NEYDL (none of the dads in question had ever met another young dad before they joined us), these guys have each other, through thick and thin! Not a bad legacy for a ‘small but vital charity’ such as ours. Father Unknown was directed by the brilliant Jonah York (formerly a NEYDL staff member), produced by Jonah and the equally brilliant Dr Michael J Richardson (former trustee of NEYDL and current volunteer beekeeper), and written by Jonah, Michael, Elijah Young, Steve Byron, and members of the charity’s young dads council (AmbassaDADS), following extensive research involving young dads supported by NEYDL. A prerecording of Father Unknown is freely available to view only on NEYDL’s flagship DigiDAD website https://www.digidad.uk/father-unknown/ Father Unknown A young dad’s story 15 June - Durham Gala Theatre 16 and 17 June - Northern Stage